Hello friends!
I hope you had a wonderful New Year's Eve and an ever better, unforgettable and wonderful year 2014. I certainly had a very.. let's say... interesting, year. A lot of things happened, a lot of tears were shed, a lot of laughter was shared, so many memories were made. There were so many truly amazing moments and thinking back now, I wouldn't have done anything differently.
But now comes the hard part, doesn't it? Now's the time where we have to make up a list of our dreams and goals for this year to come. A list that we probably will have forgotten about in a few weeks, whose content we realise we will not be able to follow through and therefore we will try to deliberately pretend this list-writing never took place, ashamed of our inability to only once actually do what we have set our mind to.
Because I have experienced this very pattern for the last couple of years, I have decided to create a not-so-impossible-to-actually-go-through-with list for 2015. I sat down and decided to only write down things which I actually have control over, and which are only up to me to fulfill. I feel like a lot of people (including myself) always try to squish in everything they'd like to change about themselves or have done wrong the previous year and feel bad about into this notorious List of New Year's Resolutions, but never actually manage to achieve any of these goals.
This is why I have come up with a few general resolutions and goals which I'm sure many of you can relate to.
1. Stop trying to please everyone
You have to accept that not everybody will approve of what you do. But that's great, because you are an individual and you can make your own decisions and live the way you want to. And you will find the people who either like and do the same things, with whom you can share your lifestyle, or those who just accept your way of being and don't want to change you. If you have people around you, who are trying to destroy your dreams and make you become someone you don't want to be, even if it's family, stop letting them! You will never be able to do and be what they want you to because you have to live your own life, make your own experiences and mistakes and learn by yourself. And anybody who wants to deprive you of this, is wrong. That's what makes you, you. Don't let anyone take that away. Follow yourself and your dreams and do whatever it is that makes you happy! And most importantly : believe in it.
2. Stop worrying about your appearance
I'm just sick and tired of so many people seeking to be physically perfect. They go on diets and die their hair, they torment themselves and are constantly preoccupied with how they look. Stop. It. I can speak from experience, it's horrible. I used to always be unhappy with the way I looked, I didn't like my arms, my hips, my boobs, I always watched what I was eating and I was obsessed with losing weight and I told myself I wouldn't stop until I finally was 100% happy with my body. Well, guess what? That never happened. I did everything I could, I was down 13 kg and much happier, but there were still things that weren't good enough for me. No matter how much people told me how skinny I had gotten, how pretty I was, blah blah. I never really listened. At some point I got tired of it. I just couldn't mentally deal with all the pressure I put on myself anymore. And I just stopped. I just stopped with all the dieting, torture, insecurity and unhappiness. And I decided to be HAPPY. To eat whatever the heck I felt like eating, to surround myself with great people and to focus on the great things in life. And guess what? I haven't gained a pound ever since. As stupid as it may sound: happiness is the solution. When you're happy with yourself and your life and you have great people around you, you will also reflect that on the outside. You will appear much more vibrant, happy and beautiful. Stop worrying about the way you look. No body is perfect, no star, no YouTuber, no nothing. Everybody has their flaws and that's what makes us human and beautiful. Embrace yourself the way you are and accept and love yourself, only then will it be possible for others to do so.
3. Get rid of negative people who make you unhappy
I'm sure I'm not the only one when I say that I sometimes just remain friends or in contact with someone who just doesn't deserve it. Whether it is an ex, a friend, a family member, some people just aren't good for you. And that's completely normal. Not everybody will always be you friend, match your personality and appreciate who you are. People say that your family is the only thing you can't chose and don't have any impact on. Well, true that. But you still don't HAVE to be with them if they really harm you (in any way). There are also many ''friends'' who you might just consider as part of your life but don't really like or feel comfortable around. And that stupid ex, who always keeps coming into your life and tries to f*** everything up - JUST because it's in his nature? FORGET THEM.
We've had the part where not everybody will always be compatible with or match you. But there definitely are some few people out there who will fully and totally love and accept you the way you are and stick around. People who you feel comfortable around, who you can speak to about everything, who you would take a bullet for. Of course there will be fights in any kind of relationship, but you will know when the people who you're willing to go through thick and thin for are in your life. No-one can tell you when you will find them, and you will definitely go through some shitty experiences and suffer until then, but once you realise you are not happy with the people who surround you, you have to erase them from your life. Only then, there will be space for the really epic ones to come. All in all, what I'm trying to say is : surround yourself with people who make you laugh, accept you the way you are and give you the feeling that you're respected and appreciated. Anyone who doesn't do these things - forget them. Friends are the most important thing in the world. Because no matter what kind of love relationship you're in, in the end, they're the once who will be there.
So these are my 3 points which I decided to take up for this year. I have chosen these 3 because I feel like they are the basis for everything in life. To be happy with and love yourself, to be surrounded by amazing people who make you happy and to accept that this is your life and your chance to fulfill your dreams, are the most important things in life. And it's fully up to you to achieve these 3 goals. All the other things like school, work, career, etc. are things which are a part of your society and culture and just part of certain periods in your life. You do also have an impact on these things, but they don't have all so much to do with you, your personality and your happiness.
Lilly
